


Holding all your hope

by FancifulRivers



Series: faded morning glories and hopes for a better future [1]
Category: Undertale (Video Game)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Gen, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, Implied/Referenced Suicide, Past Character Death, Past Poisoning, Possession
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-12-18
Updated: 2015-12-18
Packaged: 2018-05-07 10:53:12
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,123
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5454038
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FancifulRivers/pseuds/FancifulRivers
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Yellow flowers break your fall and you don't know the gift they hold for you.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Holding all your hope

**Author's Note:**

> I do not and never will own Undertale.

The flower patch is what you remember later. You were falling- limbs pinwheeling, breath driven from your lungs- and then you weren't, and the flowers broke your fall. Gold dust puffed up in a corona and you laughed, but it wasn't laughing, it was weeping. You weep a lot in the underground.

It's not until later you know what else the flowers hold. Small, fragile bones lie buried beneath their golden profusion, but you don't find that out from the monsters.

 _Chara_ echoes in your head. You don't know who that is, but it feels- safe somehow.

When Toriel finds you, Chara is afraid. You don't know why, because Toriel is kind to you, but you feel it nonetheless, a sort of mental cringe that makes your legs tremble and your fingers shake. For a moment, you think you will look down at your palms and see weeping blisters. The feeling passes. You try to question this new consciousness that has taken up root in you, but they won't answer. All you can sense is some unfathomable grief and it makes you want to cry again.

She wants to keep you there. You want to stay there. It is warm and safe and you can sense, somehow, that she will never lock you out when it's raining, or abandon you at a grocery store. You pepper your legs with bruises from clenched fists when you're alone, frustrated with yourself and yet not quite in control of your own actions. It's not  _fair_. You want to stay, but you can't.

Sneaking out is easier than you think it will be. Chara helps. You're hopeless at the puzzles, but they know them by heart. You don't think to question why. You stumble on, hands gripping the stick like it's a talisman of hope. You don't want to hurt anybody. You refuse to hurt anybody. Chara doesn't quite understand it- they don't argue with you, but they whisper stats in your ear sometimes when you're against this monster or that, dodging on weary legs and ignoring the blood trickling down your shin. 

It's their hands that wrap the bandage around your knee after, though.

 _You're good at that,_ you think admiringly, and they try to brush it off, but you can sense the blush on ephemeral cheeks, the glow your praise has evoked somewhere inside them.

 _Come on, let's go before they change their mind and beat you up,_ Chara says. You snort a little but go anyway.

It's different in the Ruins.

You've grown used to Chara in your head, sharing your body. Sometimes you think you can even see them out of the corner of your eye. They look a lot like you, but they're different enough that it's all right.

They go almost silent in the Ruins. You know what your goal is here, you know you have to find Asgore, but you don't want to face him alone.

 _Chara, where are you?_ You find an out of the way spot and curl your body into it, breathing in the scent of golden flowers. It's easier to dive into your own mind than you thought.

They're huddled in a ball in the deepest, darkest fathoms they could find. They're crying and murmuring a name over and over. It sounds like  _Asriel_ and you don't understand. When you touch their shoulder as gently as you can, they jump, falling back on their elbows. They look damaged and broken. Their eyes are shadowed with bruises and their mouth is bloody. You think if this is how you had met them to begin with, perhaps you'd be afraid now. You're not. They're lost and hurting just like you.

 _What's wrong?_ you ask and they look down, running their fingers over a worn-looking dagger nestled in their lap. The edge cuts their thumb and they wince, but don't stop the repetition. 

 _Please,_ you say, and grasp their wrist. Your grip is loose, easily pulled away from. They don't move. Their shoulders start to shake again and you think they're crying, but when they look up, you can see they're laughing. The mental sound cuts through you like knives.

 _It's my fault,_ Chara tells you through hiccuping sobs and broken giggles.  _All my fault._ And you learn of another human who climbed the mountain, another who fell down into the world of monsters. Only this one was taken in by a family (and you pause to squash the brief envious impulse, because there is so much pain here that you cannot fathom, so much pain you have no inkling of), and had a friend...

A best friend and they did everything together, Chara assures you, running their fingers along the knife handle like it's a teddy bear.

 _Only I fucked it all up,_ Chara says, staring at the ground. Their hands are covered in scars, you notice suddenly, and the knowledge is like a ball of ice in your stomach. 

And they speak of poisoning and buttercups and a plan to free the monsters, a plan that involved giving up their own life, but what did one human life matter against everyone's freedom? They wanted to die anyway. This was all a stopgap, a moment of peace, and such moments never last forever. And as they speak, you swear you can taste bitter on your tongue, can feel the phantom pain stabbing your lungs, the sores erupting on your fur-less palms and the blood, in the end, spilling out your slack mouth.

They speak of a plan, but it all goes wrong, and in the end, they died for nothing and brought Asriel down with them, and you see them crying again, crying and laughing and rocking back and forth and without thinking, you lunge forward and hug them. They hold onto your shoulders so tightly, it feels like they're drowning. You try to reassure them they couldn't have known, they tried their best, they were just a child (like you're just a child), you're determined to help them understand it's all right, and when you open your eyes again-

You spill out of the hidey hole you tucked yourself away in, because there's no room for two people, and shock freezes you in place. Because Chara's no longer curled up in a corner of your mind, no longer just a whisper in your ears, tucked inside your body like a new suit.

You look into eyes very like your own and you smile.

 _Let's do this together, okay?_ you say, holding out your hand. They look down at the knife they're still holding and let it clatter to the ground, their other hand coming up and grasping the locket dangling around their neck.

 _Okay,_ they say uncertainly.

**Author's Note:**

> I don't know where I was going with this, except I love Frisk and Chara, and also Chara needed their own body again.
> 
> Also they totally find a way to bring back Asriel too because why not.


End file.
